Friday, February 11, 2005

Left unsaid

A piece of prose on a fellow blogger's page has egged me into writing this apology finally.
She was young, beautiful, full of love, life, laughter, dashes of innocence here and there. All this was with her till one singular moment within the confines of cold hospital walls. Convinced that life is just, and things can't possibly go wrong, she fell asleep. And then it happened.
He said one final goodbye. She saw his shell. Felt like he was whispering to her. Be strong, I'm not actually leaving you.
She awoke, shaken, and just that moment they got to hear. A "sorry" from the doctors who said he was doing fine just a few hours ago. Bitter tears, harsh realities.
She went back to the beach they visited a week ago. Where he sat next to her on the beach and said he'd like to stay there forever. She went back to do just that. Make him one with the ocean he so loved. The saltiness of the sea, the saltiness on her face all one, all the same.
What will now happen of this little girl?
Will she also look for small pleasures, sweet memories as she goes through a wardrobe, searching for a familiar smell? Will she see that time doesn't wait, everytime she holds a familiar watch in her hands? Will she smile with a tinge of sadness as she picks up the phone he always held? Will she remember those stories he liked telling her, will she remember his final promise that he will always be with her? Will she celebrate the life that once was?
I donot know the answer. And I am sorry, that this happened to someone very young. That this was sudden. That he tried telling you. And you somehow did not see.
I am sorry.
You always will be his little girl.

7 Comments:

At Friday, 11 February, 2005, Blogger Dreamcatcher said...

oh dear this was so desperately sad that it made me all teary..
sometimes mere words can say so much.
is this real?

 
At Saturday, 12 February, 2005, Blogger Akruti said...

what will happen to this small girl? if only someone could answer this,if only the person who left knew what it would do when he leaves her alone,there r somany questions in this world of emotions,if only we could find the answers,life would have been so simple....
i dont want to say how it touched me,because words sometimes takeaway the beauty of the feelings,but i was just wondering,i still can feel the pain and cry:) godbless u

 
At Saturday, 12 February, 2005, Blogger small squirrel said...

this was hauntingly sad and beautiful and so very very evocative.

it's so hard to say goodbye to someone, especially when they leave this world unexpectedly... so much unfinished business. so much left behind.

reminds me of an REM quote (yeah, duh..song lyrics, sorry) "it's easier to leave then be be left behind..." so simple, yet so achingly true.

 
At Sunday, 13 February, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At Sunday, 13 February, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

true and heart wrenching !

here is something ...

-as light fades unto darkness
-as she stumbles
-teary eyed and in pain
-holding close the sights, smells, the words and caresses
-every heartbeat a reminder of what was!

cry child cry!!!

as the salty tears of love join the ocean...

what was shared, loved and lost will always be ...

scars remain and may ache but it is joy and love that will blanket her once again as she learns to move on with the life that she still has ...

a time will come when she shall breathe light again...

a day will come when she shall share,love, cry in laughter and joy with another ...

Life gives and takes ... and that is how it is.

 
At Sunday, 13 February, 2005, Blogger {illyria} said...

so melancholy, so beautiful...the way you phrased this made me want to cry.

 
At Tuesday, 15 February, 2005, Blogger Prat said...

DC, yes. Happened to someone I love dearly.
Neels, God bless you too. And while at it, bless everybody!
Squirrel, the ache and emptiness is unparelled. The grief shoving you into emptiness. And, it is difficult to even watch someone walk away.
Kishore, thanks so much for those words. There is truth in what you say, but doesn't make it easier, sadly.
Transience, sending a big hug your way.

 

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